something immovable

It was the last day of our family reunion on the coast when I realized it.

The beach is one swirl of constant motion. 

In the early morning light, I saw it so clearly. Shells tumbled up and skidded back in harmony with the tide. The sand continually whisked from under my feet. The crashing forward then sucking back of the waves. The wind shifting the clouds and mist of an endless sky. The morning sun hidden then at once bright shining. Even the pelicans, sandpipers, and seagulls were in perpetual motion skimming waves or strutting down the sand. 

'Uh, Beth, it took you seven days to realize 
things move on the beach?...'  

Let me explain myself. 

You see this revelation, although obvious, was the opposite of a memory that had captured my thoughts all week. One of a previous reunion on this stretch of beach. One of my Dad.

My Dad, and a certain stringy-blond, waif of a little girl who would not be content in the shallow water. And I've not forgotten what it felt like to wrap my bony arms around his neck and cling tight to his back as we made our way to where the waves flung their bubbly spume and rolled their mighty rolls in what seemed a magical deep. Nor have I forgotten what I felt as those waves towered high above our heads and, at times, swallowed us whole in their powerful curls. 

I felt bold. 

And fearless. 

Let the waves crash against my tiny frame. let them turban my long-stranded hair about my face and fill my mouth with the taste of salt. I was attached to something immovable. And when my strength gave way, something greater than I anchored me tight: My Dad's thick, strong arm was about my waist. I could face the waves with a sheer joy that rivaled that of the cawing gulls dipping in the sky above me. 

This scene played out many times at our reunion last week. Tiny nieces and nephews all timidity at the ocean's edge. But against the broad shoulders of my brothers, they became reckless bold and laughing as the waves rushed about them. They knew what I had so many years ago. Though their lilting voices and waving hands could not explain it, they were attached to something immovable. And that changed everything.

Life is one swirl of constant motion. 

From every direction it crashes against us all unpredictable and daunting. At times we feel it rip the very ground from underneath us. And the future clear and bright shining all at once turns taciturn. We tumble. We are pulled and pushed.

But we are attached to something immovable. A Rock. A Strong Tower. A Fortress. And though our flesh and heart fails, we find about us an arm strong in salvation that will not let us go. So let this world surge around us, let it tumble and plunge us. We face it bold. Fearless. With a certain abandonment of joy. For nothing can pluck us from our Saviour's grip. He told us so. And we've known it true. 

But it's not just that we're anchored fast to this Rock. Hidden in every wave-curl is a sovereign design. As this life towers then crashes into my thousand-edged points, those jagged corners of me, they transform. They soften, and purify, and tumble us smooth and shining. Making us more reflective of the Christ who holds us tight in His strong arm.

And that's when those around us notice. Scouring this broad earth for a shell-shard of meaning...Look, they say, this one's different. It's all smoothness. All gentleness, kindness, meekness...all joy and confident faith...how can that be on a beach of manic, roaring motion? Then we need only point them to our Saviour.

And what was a faint reflection in us, they see full on for themselves in the face of Christ. Our Rock.

Beth

dear single: let yourself adult

Dear single, you don’t have to sleep on a twin bed. You don’t have to share a room. Or a house. Or a car. You may choose to. You may enjoy doing so. Or be happy to for a time. But you do not have to. You are an adult. It’s ok.

 Know what you love doing for God? Know how He uses you? Single, run toward it. That may look like a very small step for man as well as a small step for mankind. But single? Keep stepping toward your calling. You are an adult. Now is the time. 

Learn to say no. There can be pushback when singles decline ministry opportunities in the church. One reason may be that sometimes we are not viewed as adults in the church context (with the right or need to say no) until we are married. And perhaps we have encouraged that perspective? But don’t assume single=should be in ________ministry or should not be in_________ministry or should be in all the ministries. Our spiritual gifts may not fit people’s perception of what a single should do. Because (truth-bomb) we are simply adults who are not married. Our gifts and strengths and loves reflect the infinite creativity of a perfect Creator. And while we should be willing to serve where we are needed, sometimes we must say no. 

Steward the skills God has placed in your hand. Writing does not bring home the bacon in my life now, but to set aside this gift would make me an unfaithful steward. “But God, I was unmarried” will not fly someday. What’s in your hand, single? What passion? Skill? Training? Be faithful with it.

Don’t be content fulfilling the responsibilities you had 5,10,15 years ago. That’s weird. Growing older should mean a growth in wisdom which should mean a growth in responsibility. Don’t fear taking on more responsibility. Buy the car. Plant the garden. Purchase the home. Commit to the ministry. Take the position. Let yourself be tied down. (Get married?) Start the company. It’s what adults do. 

If we are still content to fill in the blanks of our junior-high, cartoon devotional booklet, something is wrong. Singleness does not give us a pass on pursuing Christ. Do what it takes to grow spiritually. Carve out the time, pursue the resources, be in church and plugged in there. Run your life up against godly people. Don’t put your spiritual life in the back seat. You can’t afford to; you’re an adult. 

Work long and hard enough to support yourself whether you choose to live independently or not. It’s what adults do.

Take care of your body. It’s not somehow worldly or less than to do what it takes to stay healthy. It is wise and appropriate. Even as a single it is not selfish to rest. To have an evening at home. To work out. To let yourself recover after a season of intense giving. To decline the longer hours at work. To go to bed early on Saturday so you can pour yourself out with joy on Sunday. At this point in life we should know our physical boundaries and be content with them. This world does not need another believer whose health is wrecked, nerves are shot, and spirit is destroyed because of overwork. That is not a sparkling, jeweled trophy of super-spirituality--another saint broken for the cause. That is unwise stewardship of the temple of God. Single, stay healthy. 

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Dear single, 

God has allowed us to grow into adults. It is His plan that we should live like one with all the good and hard and beauty and work inherent in that. We were children. Now we are no more children, but load-bearing citizens of His kingdom and coheirs with Christ. 

Let’s live it. 

Beth

it's not about you and why that's a very good thing

Psalm 46 is a classic. Even as I write this, my mind is filled with a well-known musical setting of these verses. This Psalm is used for everything under the sun, and you could probably quote most of it. It begins “God is our refuge and strength…” Got it?

 But God only speaks once in this psalm.  One small verse out of eleven. It’s as if He reaches the point where He must interject saying let me apply this for you. Or as a former college professor used to tell us, let me put the cookies on the bottom shelf. And what God chooses to say in the next three lines is as radical as it is wonderful.

Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.”

He is saying, stop. Stop and consider that what you see my sovereign hand doing in this world and for my people is for my glory. I am God. I protect and strengthen, and preserve and tear down, and build up, and allow…for my name’s sake.

I will be exalted.

It’s not about you.

You see the Psalm is true. We may well find our refuge and strength in God. He will rise up and go to war for us and break our enemies. He will live in our midst. He will make the noise of strife cease. But He does this so that the heathen and the whole of His creation pause to look and see Him high and lifted up either by our strong testimony in life or because there will be no other option at the end of this life.

And maybe God is there in our hurt and hard not so we can wring from Him every last drop of what we need. Maybe He’s there so we can take a good look at a hand that is not shortened and an ear that is not heavy. And what if our response to the rough and tumble of this world is not one of desperate clawing for relief from Him, but one filled with trust and wonder and praise for Him?

The psalmist is telling us that it’s not so much the fact that He is our refuge, as it is the fact that the Lord of hosts and God of Jacob is our refuge. He is mentioned 15+times in this short psalm. He saturates it. He is the song.

It’s not about you.

So stop being afraid. Stop the worry. Stop being faint. Stop falling. Stop panicking. Stop manipulating. Be still, and consider the God who is at work in and around you.

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in the time of trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though earth be removed, and though mountains be carried into the midst of the sea, though waters thereof roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof…

The Lord of hosts is with us.

The God of Jacob is our refuge…

Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted…

they who stand and wait

Waiting gets a bad rap in our world today. We wait in traffic. Wait in line at the grocery store and restaurant. We wait for people who are late. We wait for someone to take action that we cannot. We wait on someone to learn what we already know. We wait for fresh donuts…

God’s had me in this classroom of waiting recently. There’s this possibility He’s brought into my life that is unexpected and exciting. (note: I am not talking about a male) But everything’s gone into slow-mo. For months. And y’all, I’ve wanted to bolt for the door of that waiting classroom God has me in. Escape. Bounce off the ceiling. Claw through the walls. You get the idea.

But here’s what I’ve been learning.

Waiting requires work           

Waiting on God doesn’t magically happen. It’s not our default setting. Anxiety, frustration, manipulation, full-speed-ahead, agitation, depression, and resignation are all much more natural. That’s why David shakes himself out of his depressed state with a drill-sergeant like, “My soul, wait thou only on God…” in Ps. 62.  Then he takes the rest of the Psalm to rehearse for himself the who and why of that. And we can do the same. But it’s going to take work. Ongoing. Deliberate. An intention turning away from my natural response and turning toward God, fixing the eye of faith on Him. Waiting, on God.

Waiting appears useless

My life is wasting away. I better pull some strings. I should make a call, shoot an email, pace the floor, do a little passive aggressive thingy…I thought all sorts of stuff like this. And I began to miss the people, needs, joy, love and service that were right in front of me. You see waiting and doing are not mutually exclusive. Waiting piggy-backs on what I know is God’s will for me right now. And when people rush to get to the next thing in God’s plan, it never goes well. Hagar and Ishmael come to mind and the prodigal son. You could name more. But type “wait on God” and like phrases into the search bar of your Bible software and let the passages wash over you. God is clear: there is tremendous value in the wait.

Waiting takes time

I know, right? Obviously. But in God’s economy there is no hurry up. No rush delivery. No snowflake before the last leaf He wants on the ground drops. There is a season to everything. A time. A God who sees a thousand years as a day and a day as a thousand years. I may panic as the grapes seem to rot and sour. He smiles at the rich wine that is to come. He makes all things beautiful in His time. Do we believe that? Then we will let time unfold.

Waiting is worship

When I chose to trade anxiety and unrest for prayer a million times a day.  When I chose to think on things that are true. When I work hard at what is in my hand instead of pining for what could be soon. When I fill my mind with the God who is behind the wait. When I do these and more, I worship. You see,  it’s in the waiting that I find the strength to loose my grip on  the treasure of what might be and light it with a holy fire. A sweet oblation. An acceptable sacrifice. You do not have to ___________,God. But if you do, I am ready and willing. And if you don’t, I am ready and willing.

That is when our spirits become unburdened to rise and soar like an eagle on the wing. That is when we know a renewed and enduring strength for whatever lies ahead. Friends, these promises in Isaiah 40 are given to those who wait. They are given to us.

God doth not need either man’s work or his own gifts; who best bear his mild yoke, they serve him best. His state is kingly. Thousands at his bidding speed and

 post o’er land and ocean without rest:

They also serve who only stand and wait.

~John Milton

Beth

women, expectations, and 2018

Be different they say. But be you. Be whoever you want to be. Be perfectly imperfect. Be amazing. Be beautiful. Be exceptional. Be the Pioneer Woman, Joanna Gaines, Sheryl Sandberg, and Madonna rolled into one sweet package.

Marrieds, what’s your detailed list of resolutions you were able to hand illustrate in your shiplap craft room while your children were on Christmas break? Where’s your 16 year meal plan spreadsheet hyperlinked to a 300pg document of coordinating children’s crafts and meaningful marriage communication activities? Huh? Singles, what are you even doing? Are you working at becoming the complete marriageable package while being so content you never think about it? Why in Heaven’s name are you only on 7 committees? Andwhere’s that financial stability spreadsheet hyperlinked to the number of other people’s children’s diapers you’ve changed hyperlinked to your 5pt plan for increasing both in 2018? Hmmm?

Exaggerated as they are, expectations like these swirl around us sweetly insisting what we should and should not be as women in the new year. But we, real women who know the not-so-instagram real lives we live, know that we cannot. There’s no way we can live up to what this world, our Christian community, and our own hearts expect us to be. And that’s ok because Paul puts things into perspective for us in Colossians 3.

v. 17 Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus…v. 23 Whatever you do…do (it) as for the Lord rather than for men…

Paul goes on a stream-of-consciousness kick between these two verses. He starts listing rapid-fire different roles in life and describing how each role can be unto God. Husbands, wives, children, slaves, masters, but not singles because we’re perfect. Joke. He includes us other places.

Paul is giving us a radical principle here. Everything that my current role in life demands of me, I may do for the cause of Christ. I can submit as a wife because I’m under the banner of Christ not because it’s easy, comfortable, looks good, or makes things easier. I can maintain a holiness in body and spirit as a single because my allegiance is to God not because it fits with the way I was raised, simplifies life, or makes me feel righteous. (I Cor. 7)

 The Lord Jesus can motivate letting myself be loved when I don’t want to be loved, giving when I would just like to get for once, or listening when I would rather talk. He can motivate washing that dish, writing that job email, preparing that meal, walking into that meeting, folding those clothes, and entering that work data…yet again. And you mind as well throw in eating and drinking for Him while you’re at it. Paul does. (I Cor. 10:31)

You see, God is not calling us to superwomanhood, a foreign country, martyrdom, or the worst and biggest here. This is not a command to make our home, appearance, career, love life, weight, or parenting perfect here. This is a call to do every detail of our current role in life for God. God is not standing at our side barking do better or do more, He is saying do it for me. Wife for me. Mother for me. Work 8 to 5 for me. Friend for me. This is at once both the high calling of the Christian life and freedom from the oppressive expectations we find inside and outside of us.

Hallelujah.

So, this is what I will be in 2018. A small, single woman in her 30s with a career and rental home. A teacher. A writer. Counselor. Church member. A lover of nature, art, music, and food. Reader. A friend, sister, aunt, daughter, and coworker. And in all these that form my current role in life, I resolve in 2018 to be unto God.

What will you be?

Beth

On Christmas poetry

I’m convinced that Christmas carols contain some of the finest words ever penned. Perhaps this is because their topic is the greatest the world has ever known. The advent of Christ. The incarnation of our Creator. Everything, everything, hinges on the Christmas story.

And if there’s one carol theme that keeps me completely mesmerized, it’s the fantastic contrast between what is happening and what is actually happening in the Gospel accounts. There’s an expectant couple. An inn. A birth. There are shepherds and stars. There’s government. Travel. Baby blankets. But we know what is couched in these ordinary things. The long-expected Jesus, born to set His people free.

Brilliant.

I could write a long time about this at Christmas time. And I normally do. So I’ve included my own little carol below not because it’s well written, but because it helps me flesh out the wonder of this beautiful contrast in the Christmas story. May it prompt your own worship this week.

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In a humble stable room,

The mighty promise now unfurls.

Against the stiff and earth-warm hay

Lies the Saviour of the world.

See the child in swaddling wrapped?

He will wrap the world in love.

Greatest love that can be known

The Father sends His only Son.

Hear the infant’s peaceful sleep?

He will bring us peace with God

And silence make of all our foes.

A quiet worked by His own blood.

Sinners now rejoice and sing!

Christ into our night has come.

Like a Dayspring from on high

For all to know a glorious morn.

In a humble stable room

This glorious Christmas morn.

Beth