do not...lest you

Sometimes I hesitate to act in my Christian life for fear of what the result will be. As in, I don't ask God for something I think is good for fear that it will come in the form of something undesirable. I mean what if His will turns out to be something I don't want? Yet we all know that His Word says I may freely ask for things knowing that He will never give a stone or a serpent in response, right? Making my hesitation completely unfounded.

Thus and hence, and posthaste this post was formed. To prove Biblically how ridiculous my fearful hesitation really is. There are many more examples like these in Scripture. Please share your own!

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do not give to others lest you receive an overflowing return.  Lk. 6:38

do not forgive those who wrong you, lest you receive Divine forgiveness. Mt. 6:14

do not lay down your life in God's service, lest in doing so, you find it. Mt. 16:25

do not leave people and places dear to you for Christ's sake, lest you receive their multiplied equivalent in this life and the next. Mark. 10:29-30

do not die to selfish desires lest you find yourself springing up with fruitful life. Jn. 12:24-25

do not douse your public life with good works, lest others see and glorify God. Matt. 5:16

do not maintain a humility and fear of the Lord, lest you overflow with riches, honor, and life. Prov. 22:4

do not seek Him, lest you find Him. Jer. 29:12-14

do not keep your most costly sacrifice and passionate pursuing of Christ hidden, lest He reward you openly. Matt. 6:1-6

do not cry to the Lord, lest He hear you and deliver you out of your troubles. Ps. 3; 34:6,17

do not submit to God and resist the devil, lest you find victory and rest. Js. 4:7

do not go near the throne of grace, lest you find there a help in time of need. Heb. 4:16

do not stay your mind on God, lest you be folded in a perfect peace. Is. 26:3

do not lift up your eyes, lest you see a world ripe for Gospel harvest. Jn 4:35

do not do good to those who hate you, lest you be labeled your Heavenly Father's child.  Matt. 5:44-48

do not appraise this life with its pleasure baubles, lilting voice, and shimmery accolades as the empty refuse that it is, lest you win Christ.  Phil. 3:7-8

lest you win Christ.

Beth 

the importance of being Nikki

Can I say how I love you for loving the "Grandma post" a couple weeks ago? (miss it? find it *here*) And since I'm obviously far down memory lane already, there's someone else whose impact must be shared.

But first, let me introduce you to preteen Beth. She's oblivious to most of life in general. And she will take most of that glorious oblivion straight through her teen years. Think tangle-haired tomboy, acne, and clown-like facial expressions. (maybe you can just visualize this so my pride can remain slightly intact?) Most importantly, I was completely unencumbered with how I may be perceived by others.

pre-acne Beth working on what Nikki called 'devos' 

God's mercy is indeed everlasting. 

And through all this, there was Nikki. Nikki was 8ish years older than me. She lived on farmland a flat 25 minutes from our town. I adored her. As a toddler, I spent hours on her lap at church. Sometimes she'd flip me over and rub my stringy blond hair on the carpet, making it stick straight out like an Egyptian goddess. This was beyond cool. And a credit to the static properties of commercial carpeting. 

As I grew older, Nikki caught on to my love of horses and would have me out to their farm to ride. She encouraged my love of watercolor painting by giving me a (now well-worn) technique book. When she left for Christian college, I received handwritten notes. When she was home on break, we'd go out for pizza or ride horseback together. All this, for an awkward, fast-talking, acne-encrusted, pastor's kid. Glamour was not her motive, folks. 

Discipleship was. Nikki asked about my life and listened. Then with sparkling eyes and awesome humor, she'd challenge me to think Biblically. She was the only one outside the authorities in my life that asked about my walk with God. And I soaked it up. She inspired me to make Bible reading personal. To pray over little things that loomed so large in my adolescent mind. And I've lost count of the spiritual decisions I made in my teens that were followed close by "I can't wait to tell Nikki." 

Nikki was not perfect. I was aware of that. And I couldn't follow her path in everything as we grew older. But the impact. I can trace crucial threads of my current life to that friendship. 

Nikki (bottom left) hanging with our youth group at camp

So....what? 

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Parents? Find Nikkis.
(hint: singles make great Nikkis)

Like this: Hey! This is my child and how I'd love to see them grow (in salvation or sanctification), would you be a regular part of that? A steady, habitual voice? We would love for you to partner with us.

1) Approach with a plan. A young mom once asked me for this with her children. She came with a plan and tailored it to work for me. It made for an easy "yes." 

2) Avoid church times. Church can be hectic for all. Plus, your child is already hearing many other voices on those days, and wants to run around with (ahem) fellowship with friends. 

3) Be persistent. We all be in da' busy boat, y'all. But some things are worth pursuing.

4) Keep babysitting separate. Babysitting is great, but if there's more than one child, it's mostly spent keeping your children out of imminent danger like running water or the clutches of an angry sibling. Not the most effective for one-on-one discussion.

Singles? Be a Nikki. 

Like this: Hey! I really enjoy watching/talking to/teaching little______. And they seem to really like me already. Have they accepted Christ yet? What are you 'working on' with them? How can I partner with you in that? What would be most helpful?

1) No perfection required. My friend's flaws made her real to me. Something I was eager to find (and good at sniffing out) as I grew up. 

Riding at Nikki's farm. That hair though!

2) Realize the impact you can have by simply paying attention and listening.

3) Use your unique personality to speak about Christ and a walk with Him. Don't assume others are doing that. 

4) No need to be profound. The gist of Nikki's words? "Hey, want to follow me like I am trying to follow Christ? He's wonderful." simple and powerful. 

5) Leverage interests and hobbies. Scrapbooking, horses, painting, sports, ice cream eating (awww yeah)...all these and more can be a platform for Gospel impact. 
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There's no age limit/life season constraints on Biblical discipleship. Older men teach younger men. Older women teach younger women. Pretty much all-inclusive, right? Also, I've got to say that I'm not so good at this Nikki thing. Too focused on tackling goals/vaulting to the next thing etc. that I easily forget people. But that's not an excuse. By God's grace, we can practice godliness. We can pray for opportunity. And we can build our "Nikki" muscles. 
That's what I want this summer.

Join me?

Beth  

but its leaves will be green

Fight or flight. That's how I do difficulty. 

Hardship comes and Beth hunkers down for the long haul. Twisting deep into it like feet burrowing into sand. Put up your dukes. Grin and bear it. Fight through it. Tough it out. Kick against the pricks. Or, I bolt. Straight from the eye of the swirling difficult. That's got to be a blue sliver of change on the horizon, right? And I will frantic race after it lest the hardship pin me against my current life with gale strength force. 

The problem is, although they feel so right in the moment, neither response is right. God's plan for me in difficulty is...hang on, I can't tell you yet. 

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I'll spare you the soggy details, but the other day I was hit hard with the error of these two ways. And found myself praying this: Lord, I'm tired of doing it wrong. Would you guide me to your thoughts about this? I'm asking for wisdom. I need the entrance of your words to give me light. And sure enough, three passages came clearly to mind as I sat there waiting. Can I risk your attention by quoting them? 

"Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD and whose trust is the LORD. For he will be like a tree planted by the water, that extends its roots by a stream. And will not fear when the heat comes; but its leaves will be green, and it will not be anxious in a year of drought nor cease to yield fruit." Jeremiah 17 

"But he (the man who delights and meditates in the law of the LORD) shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that brings forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper..." Psalm 1 

 "As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in Me, he is thrown away as a branch and dries up..." John 15 

At first glance, there's no difficulty in these verses. They're all gushing streams of cold water. Green, crisp leaves. Trees surging with life and bowed heavy with ripened fruit. Vines twisting powerful towards the sky. Strength. Health. Life so rich that it can afford to be unaware. 

But take your eyes off the foliage for a moment, and it'll strike you with biting force. What surrounds the thriving greenery in these scenes? A withering heat. Long stretch of drought. A parched ground and heaps of cast-off, crackling refuse. Listlessness. Hopelessness. Surrounding this lush life? Is death.

This is a shocking paradox. Life is impossible in these conditions. Nothing bears fruit in drought. No one thrives in difficulty. What's going on?

There's a secure connection to a source of life. 

The tree in Jeremiah 17 is thriving because her roots reach into a stream. For the believer, that stream is the LORD. No fear or anxiety disrupt a believer who trusts in Him. He's securely connected. 

The tree in Psalm 1 doesn't wither because it's planted near water. Here, the water pictures the law of God. And the one who opens his mouth wide by delighting and meditating in that stream, is surprisingly unaffected by the force of difficulty around him. 

And those branches hanging heavy with fruit in John 15? They spring from a strong vine flowing with nutrients and moisture. When I abide in Christ, this passage spares no words in describing the blessing that flows from that connection. And that connection is secure. 

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So I trust in God; filling my mind with who He is and believing it. I make His Word my constant meditation and delight. I consciously seek His filling and strength in the moments of life. Something well-described as abiding in Him. And...I flourish. Grow strong and healthy at life. Bear much fruit. THAT is God's plan for me in hardship. I find myself smiling to see it so full of good for me and benefit for God's kingdom. A far cry from the discomfort and tension of fighting. Much more fulfilling and infinitely better than bolting. I've got a connection to the Source of Life (incidentally the living Water, Word, and Vine) that cannot be broken.

And sometimes the soil of greatest difficulty grows the sweetest fruit and greenest leaf.  

Beth

the unexpected impact of a life

Come on in and welcome! Here, have a seat next to me. I've just been looking through some old photographs, and there's two women I'd like you to meet. 

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Both of them so very beautiful. 


One with the quickest wit. 
One with the warmest hug. 

Both generous. 
Both gracious. 
Both industrious. 

One with a belly laugh to beat all laughs. 
One with a pursed-lip smirk you've probably seen on me. 

Strong women. 
Intelligent women. 
Women not to be crossed. 



Falling in love through wartime. 
Raising families during peacetime. 

Devoted to their spouses.

Good at life. 

Teaching me (without realizing it) the beauty of simple things like fresh coffee table arrangements and steaming pans of casserole on cold winter nights. 

One an avid reader. 
One a Wheel of Fortune whiz. 




One whose love of art continues to influence my own. 
One whose love of lawn care explains my own sun burnt arms.

Both supporting my life path even when it wandered far from what they may have thought was safe or best. Certainly when it looked far different from their own at my age. 


One leaving this world not long ago.
One leaving this world very soon... 
Both leaving a beautiful legacy. 

These are my Grandmas. 

And I owe more than my parents to these women. I owe much of who I am today. Down to my love of classical music and dim lighting in the evenings. Down to my love of black and white films with a bowl of ice cream and a warm blanket. A love of words. A love of family...
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All this. But you know, neither of my Grandmas sat me down and lectured on being loyal and generous and how to keep a comfortable home and how to love. Most likely, they had no idea I was listening and watching and absorbing their lives from across the couch, room, state, world...but I was.


And it's made me think this week of who may be watching my own life. Learning what I'm (unintentionally) teaching through every day activities, conversations, and choices. Because I think those around us are paying much closer attention than we realize. And that makes for a platform of possible influence far greater than I can imagine. The unexpected impact of one life. 

Beth

what do you weigh?

Please take a moment to appreciate the sheer brilliance of this post title. I've been practicing my click bait technique, can you tell? 

(brief pause as Beth reads the title again and let's out a long sigh of contented happiness) 

Okaaaay, let me explain. 

To function in the adult world, some sort of analyzing or mental weighing has got to take place. Like hmmm, should I let that strange man with a face mask and crowbar into my home to replace plumbing I didn't know was broken? Or, should I spend my paycheck on a new piece of local art instead of groceries this week? (jury still out on that one) Maybe those aren't the most relevant examples, BUT each one of us weighs all the time whether we realize it or not. 

And then there's the times I analyze what's in my heart. And I find (along with the deceitfully wicked part) huge emotions like gratitude and love and wonder for Jesus Christ that just might explode and tear straight through me if I don't keep a tight lid on them. All believers experience this to some extent. We've been created and redeemed to glorify God. We are bent that way as new creatures. 

And I find that I want to do something for God that matches the hugeness of these emotions, you know? Something that will express them accurately on a human scale lest they burn straight through me or waste away somehow. And there's the rub: I'm using a human scale. My own understanding. A scale that says I've got to go somewhere exotic or do something outrageously difficult or fantastically adventurous or be some scintillating phenomenon in the Christian galaxy to accurately display what's in my heart for God.  

But when I weigh on this scale, I forget. 

I forget that God's scale doesn't work like this. I forget there's heaps of glory to be placed on His scale simply in my eating, and drinking, and everyday doing. Forget that He weighs carefully each cup of water given a tiny child. I forget how many of Christ's words were spent teaching the dense value of simple, faithful stewardship. (1 Cor. 13; Matt. 10; Lk. 16)

I forget that He's glorified every time I just do with my might what I find in my hand. That each act of service for those considered the 'least of these my brethren' makes His scale hang heavy low with its weight. How sometimes He quantifies the value of one as much greater than one. That if, without faith, it is impossible to please Him, every choice, and action and thought with faith does please Him. That each unseen act of surrender and sacrifice is weighed by the one who sees in secret. And that ongoing trial of faith? On God's scale is much more precious than gold that perishes, weighing in as an eternal weight of glory. (Col. 3; Matt. 6,13,18,25; Lk. 15; Heb. 112 Cor. 4; 1 Pet. 1:7)

And that's just a smattering of the most obvious examples. 

SO. Let's throw martyrdom and 'burning out for Christ' and all missionary and full-time ministry work, and all the outrageous acts of faith and sacrifice recorded from the beginning of time out the kitchen window. Okay? 

No no no no no no. that's not what I'm saying.

I'm saying let's stop using our own scale to measure what we (and others) do for Christ. Stop assuming we can only weigh large things. That the biggest act of service we can think of must be the best. That we must all be in full-time ministry to fully show God how much we love Him. Because we don't find that in Scripture. We find a God who is quick to point out and exult the small and hidden and seemingly insignificant. A God who gives diverse gifts, desires, and responsibilities that we are to weave together and carefully bend towards His glory. And sometimes that bending looks like being a missionary, evangelist, pastor, mother, employee, student, spouse, writer, caretaker... And God sees the heart and tries the motives, and weighs sometimes the most unlikely things on His Divine scale. 
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So what do I weigh? (heheheh...ahem.) 

Sometimes, what I shouldn't. Sometimes, using a faulty scale. But I'm asking God to change that. I want to become skillful at using His scale. To value how and what He values. And may He receive more glory through it. 

Beth 

Easter meditation

The Empty Tomb (public domain, wikimedia commons) 

Of all the sacred events we celebrate each year, I think I feel Easter the most. I'm thrown from the depth of the garden to the height of the empty tomb in just a few days time. And what happens in between? Man's been searching for words that can bear the weight of that for over a thousand years. 

So today I add my own words to the mix. Words in obvious need of better rhyme and meter. But, nevertheless, a sincere outpouring of my heart in this passion week. May their truth encourage you as you enter the Easter weekend! 

I listen at Gethsemane, calm glen of Christ the Lord, 

Hear him kneel among the olives; pressed out and poured.

In the heavy shade, fervent prayers resound

and surrender's crimson drops saturate the ground.

I watch alone at Calvary, steep hill of sin's high cost.

See displayed my greatest gain; and for Him the bitter loss. 

Through the thick of night, eyes of faith behold

The Son of God forsaken work a love untold.  

I feel the hollowed sepulcher, cold tomb of man's defeat. 

touch where the seal was broken, and all victory released. 

From the damp of death, sparked a living flame

Where all may bask in the warmth of the risen Lamb.

Beth 

to my married peers

Hello! 

I'm Beth. And even though you may not adore the color green, chopsticks, writing, interior design, coffee, sunshine, dark chocolate, and all forms of donut and bacon like I do (why is there so much food in that list?), we still have a TON in common.

You may not realize this.

Because we're in different seasons of life. 

You have a spouse and possibly children. I don't. That simple fact is a HUGE part of our lives. It's changed (and is changing) both of us in tangible ways. Whether we like it or not.

Also, in our culture, our life season dictates much of what we do. In many churches we have different classes, activities, and places we sit in services. We both naturally gravitate to our own singles/married peers. You have a different a social circle based on your family stage of life. We will be considered for different committees, roles, and ministries based solely on our season of life. Some of this is as it should be. And some of it's not. 

Anyway, I've been thinking alot about you and all we DO have in common...and I've whittled all the extraneous brain meanderings down to a few (hopefully less random) thoughts. So grab a cup of coffee and unwrap some dark chocolate morsels with me while I say...

Hey! Let's connect over our history. 

No need to get specific here (thank me by sending donuts pleaz), but we're the same age! Which means I grew up when you did. Played with the same toys. Watched the same movies. We wore our hair the same way (Heaven help us). We left home around the same year. Most likely, we slodged through the same four years of college. We entered the grown-up world and began our first jobs at the same time in our nation's history. We've voted in the same elections. Because we're in the same generation, much of 'what we do and think' is similar. 

Those commonalities alone could fill hours (or bits and pieces of minutes in between our crazy schedules) with connecting. Let's do it!

Hey! Let's connect over life responsibilities.

We both got 'em, bless their hearts. We both got to shop, budget, pay bills, clean, cook, disciple those in our care, nurture our spiritual lives, maintain vehicles, lawns, etc. etc. etc. Granted, these responsibilities are going to look a bit different for both of us. But please remember that singles are not frittering their way through long hours of strolling through sunlit fields or lolling around for whole afternoons in trendy coffee shops. We are functioning adults carrying a grown-up load just like you. We're just carrying this load as one instead of two. So, hey! We can chat and pray and counsel and encourage (and swap awesome ideas!) with each other over these life responsibilities. Let's do it! 

Hey! Let's connect over Christ. 

Your perspective on Christ will be different from mine. Things you've discovered about Him that relate to your marriage and parenting. Analogies and examples and experiences that crack parts of His character wide-open for you. Boy would I ever like to hear those things! To hear how you've grown and learned more of Christ through your season of life. I want to magnify Him together with you! And marvel at Who He is by how He's been at work in your marriage and parenting. Please, do not shy away from sharing these things. 

(Confession: I follow several mommy bloggers for this very reason. Totally LOVE you guys! Don't stop using this platform to share what God is doing in and through you as women of God. You display a unique grace that we can all take courage from.)  

Singles have a unique perspective on God as well. We've learned things about Him that you may not have had opportunity to, simply because we've done life so far as a single. Ask us about that. And let's wonder over the multi-faceted glory of our God together. 

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Want another confession? On the surface, you seem so very different than me. Totally wrapped up in your life. Like, totally. There are times I don't even understand the language you're speaking. Phrases like "and then I looked down and was covered in my kid's diarrhea" don't even process in my brain. I'm sure that singles must come across the same way. So very different from you. Totally wrapped up in our lives. Totally. There must be times you don't even understand the language we're speaking. Like "and then I looked up and realized I'd been alone for the last four hours..."

But our differences don't negate our commonalities; they only make them stand out in beautiful relief. So let's connect over our history, life lessons, and relationship with Christ.

Know what's great? I've experienced this connection with so many of you!! It's WONDERFUL. Some of you are being fantastically creative in building bridges into singles' lives. If you fall into that category, DON'T STOP. And if you don't, whether you're single or married, GET STARTED building those connections. Donuts, bacon, chocolate, and coffee aside...

We have much to gain from that connection.

Beth