Valentine Schmalentine

Don't have a valentine this year?

Think positive.

1. You don't have to worry about the number of chocolates you stuff in your mouth at one time (or the resulting volcanic eruption on your face) because no one is staring googly-eyed at you. 

2. You don't need to pretend to be happy for a poorly chosen bouquet of...a 1/2 dozen red carnations with generic greenery. 

3. You have no unrealistic expectations. 

4. You can put what you would be spending on a personalized gift into your savings account (woohoo). Or better yet, use it to fund the amount of kleenex you will need on the 14th. 

5. No feelings of anxiety to match or exceed the secret surprise your significant other is planning. (oh...you got me a mercedes? well, (ahem) I got you a bag of skittles--insert nervous laughter and eye contact avoidance--) 

6. If this Saturday sneaks up on you unawares...no harm, no foul. 
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Ok, so maybe these points really don't help. But the reality is, most every single-and-not-currently-dating person has some kind of battle plan to get them through this mushiest of all mush-mush days. 

Some find peace in blending the perfect snarky comment and pouring it all over social media. Others find hibernating in their home alone in the dark and watching I Love Lucy to do the trick. Still others may be so brave as to EAT OUT ALONE. And some find comfort in setting aside the day to reflect on God's personal, powerful love for them. But whatever your battle plan for this Saturday happens to be, do remember these four simple guidelines:

1. Be kind.  

Really. If you find the need for snarky cannot be squelched, use it sparingly and make yourself the brunt of it. BE KIND in your comments and conduct around those who celebrate this day with someone special. It's Biblical. 

2. Don't compare. 

Want to stay off the struggle bus this 14th? This point's really gonna help. Don't compare what you and your friends-with-significant-others have on this day. It will only lead to discontent and anxiety. And we all know what our Bibles say about those. 

3. Rejoice with those who rejoice. 

Human love is a beautiful thing. And many of us singles will watch friends and dear ones rejoice over it in just a few days. Decide now that with God's help you will rejoice along side them. Take some time this Saturday to thank God for your married or dating friends. And as you bring them before God's throne, pray for them as well. Though beautiful, human love on a fallen planet is... well... fallen. They need prayer. 

4. Don't forget the one thing that you need. 

See the valentine at the top of this post? It was given to me by my Dad many moons ago. I'm not sure how he chose the words to write in his small, scratchy printing, but I DO know it began the theme of every written or spoken counsel he's given me since: remember that your relationship with God is the one needful thing.

I think of this often when confronted with holidays, events, and situations that I know are going to be difficult because I'm single. I think, "Beth, are you acting like the most important thing is your walk with God? Is that what you are most concerned about, or is it how you will come across, when the heartache will come, if the situation is going to get really awkward etc." 

Friends, only one thing is truly needful this Saturday. And it looks a lot like sitting at the feet of Christ. A lot like listening to His voice through His Word. A lot like communing with Him in prayer. Don't forget this thing. Christ Himself said it's the most needful of all of earth's needs. 

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So what's my battle plan? As one of my favorite authors says: that's for me to know and you to find out. But rest assured, whatever it is, by God's grace, I want it to be governed by the four points above. 

Beth